literature

The Way I Live Now

Deviation Actions

Tohroe's avatar
By
Published:
169 Views

Literature Text

Today I got a haircut. I bought a new shirt, I scraped the mud off my best shoes. The good night's sleep erased dark circles from my under eyes, and for the first time in years my skin is clear, healthy rather than the sallow grey of a drug addict. My mouth stretched back in the pretence of a smile that was almost real. I've put on weight - fat now fills the gaps between my ribs and my face is no longer dominated by hollow circles for cheeks.
So yes, I may still have that scar through my eyebrow, and my joy still doesn't quite reach my eyes. And my knuckles are still grazed from that fight, and my eyes are still that deep grey of grief, and it still hurts for you to kiss lips through which lies slip so easily, but I'm getting better. I'm learning to want to be so much more for you. Have faith in me for just a little while longer, and I swear I will get this one thing right amidst all my sins. You deserve so much better, but if you want me, then you will have the best me I can find.
I lied. Going through old files on my computer, trying to create space, I found this.
Like I said, I may be uploading old ones still, but nothing new will be written; I cannot help what I have already given away to words, but I can keep what I have left.

The dead aren't living and the living won't die.
© 2010 - 2024 Tohroe
Comments0
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In